Im at strip club and am horny
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize
