If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
