would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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