if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize