How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
i dont even know how to be here
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Randomize
