Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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