So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
