Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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