shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
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