There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize