You really coming over, don't trick.
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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