Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
