Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
