no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Randomize
