you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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