New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
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