We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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