I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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