i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
