we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
