If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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