U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize
