I smell stomach acid.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
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