HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Randomize
