i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
