I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
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Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
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My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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