For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
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