I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
