The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
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he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
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The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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