i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
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