Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
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Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
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At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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