He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
