found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize
