Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
