I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
Randomize
