Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
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