you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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