Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
You've changed since you got that strap on
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Randomize