I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
Randomize
