Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
