Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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