were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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