Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
You can't just leave with hair like that
he had hair everywhere except his balls
not ubering you a puppy
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
