i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize