didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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