SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
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