He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
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