So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
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I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
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Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
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