I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
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