Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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